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Promising student in Cameroon: Outed, then an outcast

Promising student in Cameroon: Outed, then an outcast

In Cameroon in mid-May,  18-year-old Ades was on track to a university degree and a profitable career. Then his parents learned he is gay.

By Steeves Winner

Ades (a pseudonym) lived with his parents in the city of Mbalmayo. A brilliant student, he had prepared diligently for his baccalaureate exam, which in Cameroon is the gateway to higher education and a career.


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But on May 28, on the eve of the exam, his parents learned that he is gay.

They beat him savagely. He fled. When the baccalaureate exam began, Ades was nowhere to be found. His parents have not seen him since then, according to a friend who is close to the situation and who described the events in this article.

The small city of Mbalmayo is 50 kilometers south of Yaoundé, the capital of Cameroon. (Map courtesy of Ulule.com)
The small city of Mbalmayo is 50 kilometers south of Yaoundé, the capital of Cameroon. (Map courtesy of Ulule.com)

Ades was a senior in a Mbalmayo secondary school. His sexual orientation is not obvious. He is discreet, timid and obedient.

On the way to school one day, Ades met Han (a pseudonym), age 22. The two young men started dating.

For several weeks, Ades’ parents were surprised that their son frequently interrupted his preparations for the exam and left the house. Ades was going to see Han, but he told his parents that he was going to a study group with other classmates.

On the eve of the exam, which is offered only once a year, Ades left home around 2 p.m. to make sure that he knew the test location. Then he went to meet his boyfriend.

At 7 p.m., his parents noticed his absence and began to worry.

They called him on his mobile phone several times, but to no avail. They anxiously awaited his return home.

Ades got back around 8:30 p.m. He gave his parents a lame excuse, which they did not believe. To avoid a scene, Ades went to his room, leaving his phone on the table in the hall.

In his absence, the phone buzzed, signaling that Ades had received a message. His mother picked up the phone and discovered a love note signed by a man. Then she read through all the messages exchanged between the two boyfriends.

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Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni , who signed the Anti-Homosexuality Act into law in May 2023. (Photo courtesy of the BBC)

She immediately grabbed a cudgel from the courtyard, ran to Ades’ room and began beating him. Shocked, his father looked on in silence.

Ades suffered a series of heavy blows from his cudgel-wielding mother. Then he managed to escape.

When the baccalaureate exam began, Ades was nowhere to be seen. He has not returned home, though his parents say they would welcome him back.

Without passing the baccalaureate exam, Ades’ future is bleak.

Steeves Winner, the author of this article, is an activist for LGBTI rights in Cameroon who writes under a pseudonym. Contact him at steeves.w@yahoo.com.

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View Comment (1)
  • I am sorry, and no, I am not the forgiving type, I think the “mother” behaved as an animal and should be treated as such!
    Yes, Ades would be welcomed back when he would return, but for what? For “mother” to profit from him, when he’s getting a good job? And when he doesn’t do what she wants, beat him up again, or worse, blackmail him with being gay, so she gets her way? That “mother” does not deserve a son!
    And “father”…… sitting by and watching, doing nothing and watching his wife beating up their son! One word: a coward!
    Having found what a “cudgel” is (google), that animal, aka “mother”, probably has hit her son with the thing so hard, that he probably is seriosuly wounded, and may have died from his wounds!
    As said, I am not of the forgiving type! I detest people who oppose equality for all, but demand they themselves be treated like others! I can not stand individuals who, on whatever ground, deny other people the rights they themselves claim and enjoy! The fact that this “mother” treats her son the way she did because she violated his privacy (according to the article Ades is 28 yoa!), and found out he’s having a loving relation with a man, makes her, in my opinion at least, loose all rights to any respect! She knew that Ades was timid and would not defend himself, she probably killed her son, simply because he did not do like she wished, getting a gril pregnant and marry her, and thus she beats him up, probably wounding him so badly that he’s dead!
    To be honest, I hope she is found out, and put on trial for murdering a human being, her son, and gets the harshest punishement possible!
    My opinion!

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