Homophobic neighbors mock his feminine manner: Qtalk has advice

LGBTQ+ Nigerians benefit from the support provided by volunteer counselors via the Qtalk app, which is supported by this site and by the St. Paul’s Foundation for International Reconciliation.

The Qtalk user’s name has been changed in the following writeup, which is one of many contributed by the counsellors who provide advice to LGBTQ+ Nigerians via the free Qtalk app:

Gay man, verbally abused by neighbor, seeks help

Bethel, a 28-year-old gay man, is depressed because he is subject to frequent verbal abuse and threats from his neighbors who mock his effeminate manner.

In his support request, he wrote:

I just don’t know what to do anymore. I did not create myself. My neighbours have been calling me all sorts of names such as ‘girl, woman, lady, etc.’ I am just tired. Now they have started calling me gay and some are even threatening to beat me up all because they say I look and act girly.

This is messing with my mental health badly. What can I do?

In a response to Bethel’s support request, the counsellor sympathized with him and stated that what his neighbours are doing is absolutely wrong. The counsellor also mentioned that his situation was common for femme gay men, who often suffer from discrimination and bullying because of their physical appearance and perceived sexual orientation.

The counsellor further explored the idea of relocating to a different neighbourhood or city where he would possibly feel safer and respected, since public name-calling and other verbal abuses happen more frequently in slums and rural communities.

Bethel has been unable to move because he doesn’t have the financial capacity to do that, but has remained in therapy.

This article is one of five that comprise Part 15 of the Qtalk series.

To download the Qtalk mobile app, click HERE.

To support the Qtalk project financially, click HERE.

Written by Mike Daemon

Mike Daemon is the pseudonym of the founder and presenter of the No Strings podcasts, based in Port Harcourt, Nigeria, which provide a voice for the country’s LGBTIQ+ community. Through the No Strings website, he reports on issues affecting the lives of LGBTQ+ Nigerians. He launched and maintains the Qtalk app, which provides safe and private access to legal and psychosocial counseling for LGBTQ+ Nigerians. Contact him by email via info (at) nostringsng.com.

One Comment

Leave a Reply
  1. It is very sad that at this time in our modern age some people just still can not understand that not everyone is the same as they are. As men and women even though they have sexual functions to primarily procreate, it was not meant for that purpose alone all the time. Its the reason why God added sexual pleasures along with it.

    However one must recognized the limits and diversity of one’s sexual functions. Society will dictate what is morally correct for its establishment’s propagation and dominion over other races and nations. Inasmuch as everyone is born male or female it does not mean that they will sexually function as such.

    Some are born with what we call deviant behavior and some will deprive themselves of their sexual functions all together and others will follow the norm of procreation. Nevertheless there are the gay people who society considers aberrant to the nature of procreation, but the fact of the matter is that throughout the centuries this practice has never desisted.

    So one must assume that there must be some practical nature to all of it and there is, which is population control in those that do not prefer to become none sexually active or abstinent from sexual activity.

    Moreover one must be conscientious of sexual predator’s with malicious and criminal intent which should not be classified under as gay or not gay, but of a devious criminal nature.

Leave a Reply

LGBTI citizens on edge in West Africa. (Part 2: Guinea after the coup)

In Mali, fears that doctors ‘inject homosexuality’ (Pt. 3 of a series)